(c) Sam Skoda
CHAPTER 2
Glenn
Standoff pulled the utility truck over onto the easement, slamming
the
emergency brake hard against the floor. This is where the report
had specified, and
he'd spotted it right off. A huge tree-branch hung
precariously suspended,
endangering the telephone lines directly
below. Luckily, he had got here first, before
catastrophe could
happen.
Sliding
out of the cab and setting his
hard hat to his head, he sucked in at
his cigarette. A swift glance at his watch told
him it was nearly
seven thirty. There was no sign of his assistants.
"Goddamn
Cormic and Mcguire, fuckin' slacker punks!" he swore to the
empty
tree-lined road. They were obviously going to be very late.
They were always late. He
might have been late, too, if he'd actually
hit that freak standing in the middle of
the road in the fog. He took
those optional state saftey driving courses seriously.
After all, he
was a careful, responsible guy, not like those other two
assholes.
Careerless social blights, good for nothing but filling in potholes.
He
shook his head. As their supervisor, he often wondered how they
had managed to pass
the drug test the county required. Hell, if only
he had been there to stop them from
getting the job. They reminded
him of the chimpanzees he'd seen at the zoo once. Damn
monkeys!
He took another look at the time, his scowl softening. Nancy
had
woken him up early and told him her dream. He and her had been, well,
making
out in his dads garage back in Framingham. That had gotten him
all aroused and they
had made sleepy love, their naked bodies moving
together in a natural rhythm. Which,
in turn, had lead him to be a
little late, but he had made up for it by driving fast,
one of the
benefits of a county job. Still, he was never as late as his
two
chimpanzees. He decided to get a start anyway. It was on the clock,
the
taxpayers were paying him.
From
the side locker of the truck he
got out the Husquavarna chainsaw and
checked the oil and gas levels. Giving a pull on
the cord he started
it up, a cloud of blue smoke rising and merging with the
fog.
Depressing the toggle spun the blade, its tiny claws thrashing at the
air,
waiting for a real job. He set it on the ground, grabbed a pair
of ear protectors and
clamping them over his ears. Climbing carefully
up the slanted tree trunk he began to
cut slowly away at the large
limb.
Locked
into silence by the ear
muffs, his mind drifted, to thoughts of his
dads old garage, where pops had had his
shop. A tablesaw and a vice,
a big workspace lined with tools and bottles of nails.
There were a
lot of counters for all sorts of projects, plus enough room to work
on
the car. He remembered when he was younger, going into the shop as
dad was working,
seeing him in his heavy coveralls, smelling of oil
and wood chips.
He
missed his dad. The stroke had been quick, but the lingering death
had been
hard. Letting the chainsaw idle for a second, he glanced out
over the foggy landscape,
struck by the sudden vividness of his
recollections. It was the guilt, most likely,
but it hadn't really
been his fault, he hadn't gotten the high-paying county job
yet.
There had been no way he could have afforded that operation, and the
insurance
company had played like it was a god, bandying life about
without a care.
Bloodsuckers. But
they had had plenty of good times, when he was
young. Glen attacked
the resilient limb again, as if the violence could bring
those
moments back. Once, his dad had fixed his mothers big flashlight, had
given
it to him, showing him how it worked. He could almost hear his
fathers heavy voice,
trapped inside his heavy earmuffs.
"See,
Glen, you press this
button like this and it comes on. The
electricity makes the light work." It was magic
to him. By the
mere application of a little bit of force he could cause this
bright
beam to appear, like a long sword. He saw his fathers face, smiling
at him,
giving him this wonderful discovery, this welcome to the time
of machines. The smile
was large. By the simple pressing of a button,
of the toggle switch, he could make a
light come on. Glenn made the
chainsaw spin, then stop, then spin again, a slow smile
creeping
across his face.
Cormic
and Mcguire
spun to a stop in their road rally rabbit sport, flinging
gravel left and right.
They'd risen early to do laps on the old
logging roads, but had arrived late to work.
Stepping out and taking
off their crash helmets, They threw on rough work jackets.
"Sounds
like Glenn's already started." Mcguire
commented.
"Workaholic," muttered Comic, "Ahh, hell,
let's
suffer thru the reprimand." Almost six years of high school
detention had
forged a heroic resilience to the acidic effects of any
kind of guilt trip.
"Hey
Glenn!" Mcguire shouted as they approached, watching their
boss
stand on the curving tree branch. Cormic noticed that Glenn was
running the
chainsaw on and then off, a childish grin plastered on
his face.
"Hey
Glenn, whatcha want us to do?" Mcguire shouted again. Glenn,
lost in the
cottony prison of his earmuffs, thought he heard his name
being called, and looked up.
An inkiness descended over his eyes, his
heart beat magnified, a crushing oppresive
weight behind his ears. A
confinement that brought forth an instinctive fear. A
tremble ticked
in his leg, uncontrollable. But then he remembered.
There
was a pop. His vision cleared, crystalline clear. He saw his mother
calling,
he would show her what he could do. He pressed the
flashlight on, and ran towards her
as she stood out the back porch,
smiling at him, so proud. He turned the flashlight
towards him as he
ran, looking into its jiggling beam of pure whiteness.
"Mother!"
he said, tripping over something in the grass, falling. "Look
what I can
do!!" Glenn slipped off the tree, the chainsaw blade
spinning under his hand, hitting
the ground. It kicked into him,
tearing through Carhart canvas to cut deep into soft
flesh, sending
tissue flying into the earth, turning it damp with his blood.
His
hand remained pain-locked, pressing the chainsaw trigger, keeping it
churning.
His face distorted into a grimace, but would not give up
its smile. "I make light,
I.." Cormic
and Mcguire stood in shock, unbelieving as they watched Glenns
body
heave and convulse, the blade ravaging his chest cavity, splitting
his heart,
hollowing out his body. "I
make light, I make light.." Glenn barely
managed to gasp one
last time as his spinal cord was severed, a blood bubble bursting
out
his mouth. His grip at last loosened, the chainsaw idling, sputtering
to a
halt. Cormic finally moved, yelling at McGuire. "Fuck,
get on the
fucking C.B. and get some help out here!!" The two
sprang into action, doing the best
they could. The light that had
shone in Glenns eyes slowly faded to a staring black,
and the tense
facial muscles relaxed, the smile, too, eventually dying
out. Jody paced in the kitchen preparing a late breakfast of ice
cream
and banannas when she heard the commotion outside, and the loud knock
a
second later. Who could it be? she wondered. Usually jerry called
if he was going to
drop by... she peered out through the curtain. An
insistent stranger pushed his way up
to the door as she swung it
partially open.
"Excuse
me, ma'am,
but our companies looking for new customers in this area.
I wonder if you'd mind
taking a minute out of your busy schedule to
look over a few of our products?" A man
she had never seen
before stood before her, smiling at her as he regained his
breath.
Jody leaned against the doorjamb, looking him over. He appeared to be
a
typical salesman, of the type now gone, the kind her grandmother
used to invite in for
tea while she pored over sample books of
carpeting or wallpaper. Jody had never really
liked them, their pushy
fake conversations and handshaking. There was something
about
inviting business into ones personal home that just wasn't right.
"Jon
Fontaine's my name," he said, regaining his breath and handing
her his
business card. "I'm in the selling game," he smiled
at his little rhyme. Jody could
see him gearing up for another
long-winded run on sentence. There was something
different about this
man, though... she couldn't quite place it. Maybe it was a tinge
of
nostalgia, a feeling of sorriness for this man whose job seemed so
out of time
and place, a thing of the past. In fact, the impression
he gave her was of a man of
the days gone by. He really wasn't as
threatening as she remembered those others, the
cologne-selling,
leering men who put their hands on her knees when grandma was out
of
the room. No, this was a tall, thin, tan, handsome looking man with
soft brown
eyes, almost apologetic.
"Well,
what do you sell," she asked,
shifting on her feet. It wasn't
like she was against shopping, it just had something
to do with her
personality. She liked stores, and everything they offered. If
only,
she decided, she could convince herself this was nothing more than a
store
coming to you, it might even be enjoyable.
"I
have plenty of
catalogues here", Jon said, fumbling with his
briefcase. It popped open, and he pulled
out some confused pamphlets,
struggling to control them as they threatened to escape.
"Er,
ah..." he stuttered, as one slid out of his grasp. She deftly
swooped it up
before it hit the doorstep, handing it back to him.
"Why don't you come in," she
smiled, holding open the
screen for him. He was such a pitiable sight, an awkward
puppydog
offering up faux trinkets with a heart of true gold. It wasn't that
she
didn't recognize her own naive vulnerability in certain
situations that others would
tell her were risky... it was more that
she felt compelled to it, driven by some
motivation deeper than she
could control. She remembered her grandmother, brushing her
hair as
she lay in bed as a little girl. "Compassion and understanding
will always
lead you to the light," she had said. But now she
was gone, and all Jody had were her
words to hold onto, to grip with
the fingers of a child who wouldn't let go.
"I
haven't been through this area before," Jon said,
holding
tightly his slipping, prized papers as he followed her down the hall
to the
living room.
"Well,"
Jody said, over her shoulder, "It's not like
we get many
salesmen around here anymore. It's not very populated, you know."
She
moved some of her papers and an old photo album off the couch.
"Please,
sit down. would you like some coffee, tea?" she
asked, moving towards the kitchen.
"Ah,
actually, no thanks. I've got to get moving, you know, no
drinking on
the job," he said with a nervous laugh. "Besides, the
bosses, you
know..." Jody sat down in the easy chair opposite
the couch. Poor thing, she half
smiled.
"The
bosses..." he whispered, leaning in close to her.
"They
like to keep an eye on us." He winked at her, and suddenly, she
felt a cold
hard knot grow in her stomach. She felt she had been
taken in, once again, tricked by
compassion. Her intuitive warning
devices had failed her. Jon shuffled the papers on
the floor and
handed her the disarrayed stack. It only took a quick glance down
to
verify her fear. She was holding a crazy collection of memorabilia,
an old
defaced '50's comic book, some old recipe cards cut from
magazines, a crumpled
maple-leaf, a news article, faded and yellowed,
stained by the passage of time. She
looked up at him again. His hands
now look stained and grimy, not as tan as she had
thought. His face
was pockmarked and had a small scar under his chin.
"Um,
Mr. Fontaine, would you excuse me," she said, keeping a tight
lipped smile,
half rising out of her seat, but he suddenly lurched
forward, his hand moving like
lightening, grabbing her wrists. Her
heart pounded rapidly, she thought about
screaming, but she knew
Jerry, her nearest neighbor, lived half a mile away, no one
would
hear. Jon looked straight into her eyes. She felt her throat
constrict. All
her nightmares flooded into consciousness, enveloping
her in all their fear. A mad
man, a killer who would rape her. She
found she could not avert her gaze from his
forehead, from the sweat
that lay in little beads on the tensile plastic surface of
the
furrowed brow. This man was... human, she thought, and it was
so
horrible. "Ma'am,
I've just got to tell you," he said, looking
intently, his eyes
searching every inch of her face in their linked proximity. His
grip
loosened a little. He let go of her wrists and buried his face in the
palm of
his hand.
"I...
I'm so confused..." he looked up again,
grasping her wrists
before she could react, moving to the edge of his seat, where
she
could see into his briefcase, sitting open beside him on the sofa. It
too had a
strange collection of bric-a-brac. an old rocking horse toy
sat sideways, atop a stack
of old postcards from South America, some
with old faded ink writing and cancelled
postmarks. An old victorian
photograph of a baby, held by a victorian mother in sepia
tones lay
perched atop a stack of old stained newspapers and comic book pages.
An
advertisement for a vacuum cleaner that looked like it was from
the stone ages lay
ripped in half. There was a snowglobe, and a
flashlight. She returned his gaze,
steady, trying not to show her
fear. He sat up, a smile on his face, noticing her
glance at his
collection. He looked so out of place that it threw her once
again
into a state of utter fear; never had a smile communicated such a
sense of
chaos and foreboding to her.
"Actually
ma'am, if you are
interested, you could just call this number and the
company would be more than glad to
help you out. but," he
dropped his voice, leaning in close again, though she tried to
back
away, his breath smelled old and foul.
"Really,
I would just
write it down on this paper," he whispered, pushing
a scrap of childrens notebook
paper at her. He sat back and smiled,
releasing her, rubbing his hands together.
"Well
ma'am," he said, more loudly, looking over to his
briefcase,
gathering up his papers. " I really should get back on the road
now.
I..." he looked confused, turning his head, staring around
the room. He focused on a
red lampshade for a minute, then looked
down at his hands. "I..I..." his jaw suddenly
went slack,
his gaze seemed blank, as if all the life had suddenly departed
from
his slumped body, leaving this husk which would start to drool at any
minute.
Jody slowly slid off the edge of her chair, moving to the
phone by the kitchen. Jon
made no movement towards her, staring at
his hands, mumbling to himself.
"Is..
is this Kansas?" he asked, making a puppy dog face of
confusion
and doubt.
"It's
ok... Mr. Fontaine, I..I just have to
call for some.. water. would
you like some water? " she said from the kitchen, lifting
the
phone, grasping the long breadknife that lay on the counter, holding
it out of
his sight. Jon cooed, and she felt strange, talking in that
tone of voice that one
usually reserved for little kids. Her
compassion was coming back now, giving her
strength, not doubt. This
man was an adult, of that she was afraid, but he seemed so
confused,
so lost, so hurt... she felt a small part of her that still wanted
to
take him in her arms and comfort him. Dialing Jerry's number. She
stood
nervously in the kitchen doorway, listening to the phone ring,
watching her strange
guest sit, disoriented, on her couch.
"Hello?"
Jerry answered after
a click. In as quiet a tone as she could, Jody
whispered what was going on, and Jerry
said he'd be right over. Then
she hung up, and stood in the kitchen doorway, one hand
on the knife,
caught in the flypaper of silence, dancing a muted dance with
her
murmuring passive partner, entranced by the bright colors of his
scattered
confetti.
Back at the police station, or the polite square brick
building
which passed for one, Sheriff Bradford Tolland pushed a warm
styrofoam cup
between Cormics shaking hands. "Here
you go, something warm to calm
you down." The young man looked
haggard, stunned. And who wouldn't be? Sheriff
Tolland mused, after
watching someone eaten by their own chainsaw, with no reason why.
It
was the nature of accidents, the sheriff knew, from having had to
deal with them
all his life. It was his job, especially in this small
town where crime was just a
bunch of young stoned vandals. They were,
plain and simple, accidents. A brief slip,
and a life was over. One
slight misstep, or a cigarette left burning, all these random
events
could lead to death. What could one really do? Taking care always
helped,
sure, but then accidents still occurred, well, when they
occurred. To have to watch
them, though, was something else.
Traumatic, he thought, watching these two boys
struggle in front of
him. "Would
you boys like anything to eat, or how
about a cigarette?" "Yeah,
yeah," Mcguire said, and took the proffered
Camel. Cormic drank
his coffee, letting the hot steam rise into his eyes, bathing them
in
warmth and making them drift from the horrific image of the morning.
"If
only we hadn't been so late." moaned Mcguire, shivering. The
sheriff stared
him in the eye.
"You
can't change the past, what happened is over.
Accidents in life
occur. Sure you could have been there earlier. Maybe if you
hadn't
worn a hat today, maybe if I hadn't put contacts in my eyes this
morning
or if the goddam sky wasn't so goddamn red at sunrise, then
maybe none of this would
have happened. But what can you do! You want
to spend all your life living in the
realm of could have beens? Is
that what you want?" "No,
no. It's
just that, it's, I just wish..." Cormic went silent and
simply looked back into the
shiny black of his coffee. Mcguire puffed
away at his cigarette. He glanced at Cormic.
"If
you hadn't wanted to test the new suspension." he said
coldly.
Cormic started up from his seat, spilling the coffee.
"Hell,
you're the one that wanted new suspension in the first place,
you
little..." Tolland
jumped between them, calming them with his
steady, deep voice, and
the strong pressure of his hands to their shoulders.
"Listen,
listen to you. Don't you fall into this trap. Don't live
the could
have beens. Ok? Sit down, take a deep breath, you guys know
better.
You're not at fault. Calm, ok, calm..." The two young men
shuffled about,
returning heavily to their seats. Tolland knew they
hadn't meant it. Why, they'd
been friends since as long as anyone
could recall. After finishing high school, the
two of them had gone
to work for the county. They were the type who never leave
their
small home town, they have no reason to. They were born and bred of
their
land, and would live their entire lives here, drinking on
thursdays at the bar,
driving their road rally cars and motorbikes on
all the trails, picking up on all the
new girls that would come to
town, or finding them in the neighboring towns in those
towns' bars.
Eventually marrying, having kids, most likely getting
divorced.
Tolland hoped there werent any domestic violence calls, waiting for
him
under the masks of the boys faces. He sighed and got Cormic
another warm cup of
coffee, sponging off the desk. "Thanks,
sheriff."
"Yeah,"
Mcguire said, "sorry about all that."
"That's
all
right, you boys have had quite a shock. Try being a cop sometime,
you get this every
day." "No
thanks, " said Cormic, thinking he probably wouldn't be
able to
smoke dope if he was a cop.
Mcguire
stared out the window
at the small town of Shrewsbury, Massachusetts.
On the main street people slowly went
about their day. Depositing
money in the bank, buying groceries or having the
breakfast special
at Lucy's One and Only Cafe. Everyone, Mcguire realized, but
Glenn.
He stubbed out his cigarette. Sheriff Tolland once more addressed
the
two. "Now,
I know its hard, but I need to get an official account,
for the
records. Can you tell me what exactly happened, when you got there?"
He
pushed play on the small cheap tape recorder which had taken the
place of his
front-desk sergeant after the first wave of budget cuts
had hit the state.
"Well,"
Cormic began, "We showed up late,a bit after 7:30, and he was
cutting away
at a tree with the chainsaw, you know, clearing it away
from phone lines."
"And
I came up to him, and yelled his name." Mcguire said. "That's
when he fell,
and.. and.." "Glenn
had done this work before?" Tolland asked.
"Yeah,
we do it all the time, very routine." Cormic replied.
"Tell
me exactly, if you can , the procedure for clearing trees."
"Well,
I mean its all pretty normal, nothing to it really. You know,
chainsaw work.
Wear protective gloves, heavy boots, ear plugs.."
Tolland interrupted.
"He
was wearing ear plugs and running a chainsaw, did he hear you?"
Mcguire thought
for a moment. "
He looked up at me, but I didn't think he could
hear me, then he just
sort of..."
"Ran
off the tree." Cormic
finished. "Ran?"
Tolland asked, looking skeptically at
Cormic. "Ran,
slipped, fell. Yeah." said Cormic.
"You
said ran, though, first impressions are important. Why did he fall?"
The two
young men exchanged glances. "Well,
he kind of did run to us, or our
direction." "I
thought he wanted to, you know, kind of show us
something."
Mcguire said, casting another glance out the window.
"What?
Show you what?" Tolland inquired. "I
don't know. Nothing, I
guess, he just fell and.." The image of
the flying guts and skin came back suddenly to
McGuire, he could
smell the oil of the chainsaw mixed with the steaming flesh.
He
shivered, feeling the bile rise in his throat. "Now,
think clearly,
did he say anything?" Mcguire turned his gaze
from the window back to the sheriff,
thinking hard.
"I
think, think he said, 'Mother'..." Tolland etched
the word into
his scratch pad. This accident report was going nowhere.
"Isn't
that what they're all supposed to say when they go.."
muttered
Cormic. "Only
in war, Cormic, only in war. " The sheriff said,
smiling sadly
at the two shaken men.
"But
maybe in an accident too,
maybe in an accident too.." he added,
pondering. There was a silence as each was
caught up in their own
thoughts. The sheriff flicked his eyes from face to face. There
was
nothing more to learn. What can one learn from an accident but to
take more
care? He sighed, remembering poor Glenn. He'd last seen
him, when... two months ago?
When that big rig had hit a tree,
blocked the road. A very nice guy, married to that
slender Nancy. He
felt himself age years knowing he'd have to tell her the news, if
she
hadn't found out already. Small towns had their own back avenues
of
communication. Turning back to Cormic and Mcguire, he cleared his
throat and
stopped the tape-recorder. "Now
go on home, take a few days off, rest and
relax, deal with this as
best as you can. Thanks a lot for your help. If you ever
need
anything, just stop on by. Now go on, get out of here."
Cormic and Mcguire shuffled slowly out, leaving the sheriff to fill
out his
reports. The two of them stood looking at each other across
the roof of their
rallycar, depressed and upset. The whole morning
had been a drain.
"Hey
man," said Mcguire, " You got any good weed on you?" "Sure
I do,
sure I do Mcguire. Looks like we'll both need it, huh?"
They got into their car and
drove off.
The
sheriff watched the road rally sports rabbit turn
a corner and
disappear. Accidents take their toll, he said to himself, they do
take
their toll.
"Mother,"
he whispered, reading his note on the
scratchpad, turning back to the
report.
Shrewsbury
was
a normal town, in some ways, spread out in front of him, basking
in the early
afternoon sun. Get it while you can, he thought, before
Mr. Winter comes. Peter walked
down the main street, a couple hundred
feet of bank, local grocery store, rural feed
and hay, the lone
diner and out of business antique stores. It was a little
after
three, the hour he was supposed to meet Jack at the bar. Not that he
had
necessarily wanted to awake, but the alarm would not be silent.
He had kept swatting
at the grating machine as if it were an annoying
sheep constantly wanting more grain.
Anyway, he hadn't seen Jack as
of recent. One can only hole up in books for so long.
This
place is in a constant state of disrepair, he noticed, looking at
the
town's potholed mainstreet and dilapidated store signs. Hardly anyone
ever
came through here, since it was mostly an off the road town,
with its population of
small town eccentrics, the odd novelist or two
who had retreated here after publishing
a couple of novels, and of
course, its one struggling graduate student. The only two
real points
of interest were the bare bones of the viking settlement, a
little
north of town, and the big old railway depot.
Once, in the
1860's, during the civil war, it had been a major
northern troop transfer point, and
the large railroad station at one
end of the town had been built up as quickly as it
had left. Now it
sat alone, a large empty monument to silence. Every couple of
years
the town council tried to drum up support to turn it into
a
mini shopping complex, and every year a entrepreneurial,
youthful
go getter moved on in, only to age quickly in the next
couple months, abandoning
their dreams and moving on, or lingering,
stuck in the morass that was the towns
sluggish economy. But it was
the reminates of the old viking settlement a few miles
west of the
town on the coast which attracted Peter, had brought him here
to
Shrewsberry in the first place. It was his hope that by being close
to this near
nonexistent sight of a depression where a cabin may have
stood, of a scrap of metal
that was perhaps a nail, and other, even
less exhilarating evidence of Viking
colonization, that this
proximity would lend to an atmosphere which was congenial, if
not
downright helpful, to his thesis. There was a theory he held which
put
geography as an important factor to history. Still, Peter
sighed, why couldn't the
vikings have chosen to land in Pittsburg or
someplace more lively. The town was
already, after four months,
sucking him into its backward tow, eating itself up and
him with it.
If only he wasn't so dependent on his work to give his life
its
meaning, he would have split long ago.
He
trudged heavily up
to Hanks Bar, feeling like he really needed that
beer. Mr.Gresham, whom he sometimes
noticed at Lucy's One and Only
Diner, was sitting on the bench in front of the door,
next to Harrys'
feed and garden supply store. He looked like he was waiting
for
someone, like he had been waiting a long, long time.
"Hi,
Mr. Gresham," Peter said, walking up the decaying wooden stairs.
"Waiting for
someone?" Gresham looked at him, frowning. He
still wore his green marines jacket from
the war. Peter had no idea
what any of the myriad medals and decorations were for, but
they
always attracted him. Gresham didn't say anything, looking down at
his
scuffed old combat boots.
"Hey,
can I buy you a drink," Peter
said, suddenly feeling responsible
for the old man's lack of loquaciousness. He knew
he was a putz in
that way, but he just couldn't bear to be confronted with
someone
that exuded such an air of dead hopelessness. It just made him think
of
himself. Gresham looked up and cleared his throat.
"I
don't
drink," he said, his small, deepset eyes peering out from
his weathered face.
"Well,
how about a coffee then," Peter said, trying to gather up
a
shred of self respect. That's right, he told himself, if it doesn't
work, force
it on through. Gresham looked up, actually, Peter
imagined, cracking a small smile of
feeling.
"Well...I
suppose a cup wouldn't hurt me, " he said.
"Come
on in, then," Peter said. "Drinks are on me!"
He
pushed open the door into the dark bar, smelling of
beer soaked
wood. Hank was tending as usual. Peter and Gresham sat down at
the
counter, the same counter that Peter had been visiting almost daily
now for the
last month or so. "A
beer, Hank, and a coffee for Mr. Gresham. "
"Black?"
"Black
as the night," Gresham replied,
looking around the dimly lit
room. He gave a curt nod to Sheriff Tolland, who was
using the
payphone in the back. "Seasons
up again, Paul," the sheriff
said, covering the phone with his
hand momentarily before turning back to his ghostly
conversation,
staring at the beeper in his hand. Hank
placed the drinks
on the bar and moved back to his cash register
where he resumed reading his paperback.
Gresham grunted and picked up
his coffee. Peter watched the man drink, wondering if
maybe he
shouldn't have sat down with him today. He certainly didn't seem to
want
to talk to anyone. Peter pointed to Greshams' medals.
"You
fought in
the war?", he said, feeling embarrassed at being such
an unskilled conversationalist
that he had to rely on tactless,
forward blurtings. The two of them had had
conversations before,
though always avoiding the subject of the man's past. Peter
wasn't
sure why he had babbled out that question. It's a sign, he realized,
I've
spent to many days without leaving the house lately. Gresham was
obviously taken aback
at the bluntness of the question. People
usually talked their way around such things.
Still, Peter could see
he appreciated some of the honesty. Gresham harrumphed,
turning
silently away for a moment, then looked straight up into Peters
face. "My
eyes have seen things out there in the jungle you don't
even know
about" the vet said, drinking from his steaming cup of coffee,
steam
vapors blurring his features. "I
wouldn't want to see what you
refer to anyway, Mr. Gresham, I
wouldn't want to know either."
"I
hope you never have to, not at all, seen enough youth go down as it
is, back
then. Even now, todays cities, they're as bad as the
jungles. Just no mines that's
all, no hidden mines." He leaned
closer to Peter, looking at him from under heavy,
worn eyebrows, "I
just don't want to be invalidated, you know, forgotten. Used to
be
all these movies I'd go see, all these movies attempting somehow to
bring that
whole mess to some sort of resolution, and they were
getting close. Sure they're
movies an all, but some of them were
working, hell I knew some guys were helping with
the scripts, we were
trying to work our own way out of it. We were in there, and now
we
want out, we want out, but we just don't want to be plain forgotten,
that's
all, don't want our deeds gone to waste." The older man
leaned back, sipping again at
his coffee, his eyes glancing out the
window and around the bar. Peter followed his
gaze and then brought
it back to Greshams face. It was worn, tired, ready to give up
the
fight. There were tics and movements of the muscles, as if old faces
were
trying to push their way up to the surface. Peter sipped his
beer slowly. He knew
about the power of history. The old viking ruins
kept him in a constant state of
unknowing, and all he had were a few
rusty nails and rotted wooden beams to tie him to
the past. He had
worked for almost four years on one runic inscription, carved
a
thousand years ago, created in ten minutes by an ancient, unknown
human being...
it was enough to drive him crazy. Reconstructing one
word per year, a hopeless battle
against the power of the past. It
was different than war, though, especially in
Vietnam... or had
Gresham been in Korea? Peter couldn't remember. That was when
ones
own past was becoming lost... Gresham slid his cup away from him and
stood up,
nodding to the sheriff, throwing some change on the counter
top, stopping Peters
objections with a glance.
"Well,
gotta get back to the shack."
Peter
swiveled on his stool. Gresham looked down at the floor for a
minute,
as if indecisive, and then looked up, clearing his throat.
"I'm,
uh, going hunting this weekend if you'd like. Deer seasons up again."
He
lifted his eyebrows at Peter.
"I've
never been hunting," Peter
replied. Gresham snorted. "Well,
I've got more than a couple guns lying
around. Come up afternoonish,
if you want. Saturday." He stood around for a second
more, then
abruptly turned with a backward wave and shuffled out the door.
The
bells hanging from the jamb continued to ring behind him, and Peter
turned back
into his beer, wondering where in the hell Jack was,
thinking about
guns. |